he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
A good example of deductive reasoning: Knowing that when my girlfriend texts me "I promise not to smoke all your weed!" that she is...at that VERY moment...Smoking All Of My Weed.
Randomize