I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
Randomize