I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
Randomize
