Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Randomize