..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
I pour the whiskey from now on
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
Randomize
