As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
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