Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
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