Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
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