He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
I knew I had to get an abortion when his toddler sister came up to hug my leg and I kicked her off saying, "Get off, fucker."
i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
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