You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
So many bounce houses so little time
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
Randomize
