Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
We are two peas in an std pod
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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