I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
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