im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
Well I just put wine in my tea
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
Randomize
