If that was your dad, he is hot
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
He? As in you personified your dick?
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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