She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
Randomize
