Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
i think my cat just said my name.
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
Randomize
