He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
Your cock deserves a montage
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
