everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
Randomize