Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
I feel like abortions should bother me more
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.