I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
