I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
Randomize