Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
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