3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Randomize
