my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
