dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
You came home screaming the lyrics to Drunk in love, and dumped wine on me when I said you would never be Beyoncé
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
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