Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
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