And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
