well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
I currently don't understand fingers.
Randomize
