he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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