he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
Randomize
