There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
No subtext here. People are naked.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
Is it penis luge time yet?
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
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