Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
I need a beard to bite.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
