I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
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