I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
I think your dad took our porno
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
God, I missed his penis.
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