I CAN MOONWALK!
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
Last time i carry you out of a forest
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
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