thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Randomize
