She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
Randomize
