We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize
