I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
I would ride that face into the sunset
Randomize
