i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
Randomize