another moral hangover. fuck.
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
