You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
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I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
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