in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
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It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
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It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
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