You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
Screwed.edu
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
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