I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
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