I'm going to rape someone's good day.
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
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