Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
Randomize
