How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
Randomize
