Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
Randomize
