I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
Randomize
